Will Parker

Will Parker (5 this month) a.k.a. “WP” is the most loving of all my grandchildren.  He is my pretty boy too; seriously, he is a beautiful little boy.

His Mom is absolutely the #1 person in his life right now, with everyone else running a distant 2nd. When recently asked by me on our of our outings together, "Will, who is the prettiest girl in your school room? His reply (given with his trademark smirk) was a rather sheepish 'My Momma'".

Will has his Momma's eyes and nose (all 100% of that part of the DNA strand for sure), his Pappy's ears (which came from his great-great Grandpa Willis), making them a very special 5th generation set of ears on WP!  No, Will was not named after Grandpa Willis, but he sure does have his ears. Pretty amazing to trace the DNA, and realize that WP has only 6.25% of his great-great Grandpa's DNA, but 100% of his ears!

The rest of Will looks like his Daddy; the hair, the eyebrows, and the long-lean body shape physique of a Kueny.  Like Daddy too, Will tried to jump before he could walk, and when he did learn to walk, he learned to walk with a strut, before he could run! 

Will shares his birthday sometimes with Thanksgiving, my favorite Holiday of the year.  His birthday party last year was a bowling party, (and this years will be too), which is another one of Will’s favorite past times.  He can shot-put a bowling ball like no one else!  But in fantasy land bowling, WP is mastering Wii bowling, setting a personal best record with a 201 game.  In the famous words of our resident trash talker he told Nini, who bowled a paltry 197, “I’m good Nini!, I’m going to beat you again!” 

WP was blessed with the spiritual gift of mercy (just like his Nini, though she would debate you as to the merits of it being a blessing), and he possesses such a pure, affectionate, and compassionate heart that you can’t help but shower him with hugs and kisses every time you see him.  But, having now said that, I have been known to shower all my grandchildren (and my own children) with hugs and kisses, quite frequently in life being told to stop.  But WP has never told me to stop.

WP and I didn’t get off on the right diaper change from the get-go.  Many family insiders think that WP took it to heart when he heard In Utero that I had been adamant in my wishes that WP was a girl, (before I knew he was a boy).  The first 14 months of his life was mainly without Pappy, not that I was not there; just simply that WP wanted no part of me.  It was heartbreaking at the time, but WP and I made amends when he moved in to live with us for 3 months while his new house was being built.  Since then, it’s been all green lights.

Speaking of which, WP loves green lights when he is riding with me in my Corvette, which he knows as the ‘go fast’ car.  For the better part of a year now, Will drools to the feel and sound of raw torque kicking in gear.  Nothing brings a smile to his face quicker than when he sees a green light, and tells me to ‘go fast Pappy’.  I believe strongly in child car seats, and probably ought to have WP wear a helmet with me in the Vette; but I want you to know that ‘go fast’ does not mean that I am taking chances.  Besides, it doesn’t take much effort for him to notice the difference in a slight ‘punch’ on the Vette accelerator; because he is used to being lulled to sleep in the lumbering luxury of his Mom’s big Buick SUV . . . 

Will has a personality combination of type B, paired with anal-retentive tendencies.  He is a natural follower, and a great follower at that, but his abstract reasoning skills and engineering traits are so obvious that a person would be blind not to see them. 

Many years before he could talk, Will was mastering puzzles.  By the time he was 4, he was building puzzles that would stump most children 3x his age.  His anal-retentiveness, along with his abstract reasoning and processing skills are off the chart.  When he builds blocks with me, I can tell he sees them in 3D by how he studies them, the same way I do; and the way he can play hand held phone games, computer games, download and discard apps, (all without being able to read), are still astonishing. 

Plus, he drives computerized race cars with more skill and adroitness than some adults ever will.  Build a racetrack, assembly blocks, puzzles, color with no errors, wow; if he doesn’t end up building bridges, rockets, skyscrapers, etc. for a living, it would be amazing. 

Will’s early language skills were called “willbonics”, mainly because of his challenges with a hard K, and because of this, he was solely responsible for having several new words added to the most current edition of Webster’s.  The new words ‘brote and trut’ are some of my favorites.  Look for them soon to be used in everyday lingo; they already are by me J.  I love you Will Parker, with all my heart (a sweet Willism).