Pamela Jean, a.k.a., “Nini” was the cliché ‘high school sweetheart’ of mine. We certainly have beaten the odds; as she has been my loving wife for 34+ years, on our way to eternity together (as Paul Harvey was fond of saying). Today is Dec. 1st, 2011, and today is our 12,550th day of marriage. Follow this simple math formula to verify: d335 - d203 = 132 + (34 x 365.25) = 12,550. This automatically accounts for the leap year days that most folks would not include.
I believe in eternity together and say this with complete confidence because we are both Christians; Jesus is our Lord and Savior, and when our days are ended here on earth, we will each have our own mansions in Heaven. I do have a prayer request in; that our mansions will have adjoining side doors, and of course a shared master bedroom because I won’t snore with my new perfect body. I also personally believe and hope that we will be Raptured together, before our bodies expire at age 107, which is right around the time we’ll be celebrating our 89th wedding anniversary. I used to have a goal of living to age 100, but 107 sounds better. How cool would it be though to celebrate a 100th wedding anniversary; I wonder if that has ever happened in modern times?
If you think otherwise, you need to think again. Or, another way to say it is, if you think otherwise, you’ve got another think coming. (Notice the emphasis on the k. It’s not a ‘g’, its k; I have no idea how it started with people ever thinking it was, or is a ‘g’. It’s always been a k.) But, I digress, and will now end my English lesson. This particular blog is not the forum for me to recreate 34 years of marriage; as I know I’ll have several other opportunities to blog about specific stories and instances that touched my heart. This one though is meant to be mainly about how we met, along with some highlights for where we are at today.
Pam and I dated on/off/on throughout our years of high school together. I was originally attracted by her blue polyester pants when she was but a young 'fox' of 16, and I was an old man of 17. Blue has always been my favorite color, and when paired with those gorgeous brown eyes, and that long flowing blonde hair ~ oh!, look out!, I was hooked.
At the time, she was dating another one of her several interested suitors; I think it was the high school Marine-to-be at the time, as the 2nd time it was the basketball jock star. I’d already retired from high school sports to work full time by the time I reached my junior year in high school. I would have been reticent to have stayed in sports with a work career waiting.
Looking back, it is weird to think that I was working full time as a junior and senior, being promoted to Asst. Mgr. as a senior; and always having my DECA teacher seriously upset at each 9 week review because of the salary I received at age 18, while still in high school, being more than he made as a teacher.Pam and I worked together for a while, and word eventually made it to me that she was attracted to me via my shiny work shoes, which actually were borrowed from my Dad. Hey, whatever works right? Besides, what teenager isn’t vain? I was definitely more than a little slow in the girl department during my teen years, and I didn’t know from her form of S/M behavior that she was actually flirting with me. I just thought she was crazy trying to sneak up on me to stick a hot French fry in my ear . . ., ouch, the pain is coming back to me now.
I was driving a ’71 Dodge Charger, which was a pretty cool car for a teen boy to be driving. Pam though verbalized that she thought the car was ugly (which incidentally, I found out was/is a word that she’s always been quite fond of). Just ask the pour soul she left in the dust at the stop light when she caught him ‘eyeing’ her while seated at the stop light. Her response, a rather deafening “you’re ugly!, you’re ugly!!, you’re ugly!!!), as she raced away, and his look of bewilderment is forever etched in my brain.
So anyway, one day at work, I asked her what car she liked. She told me it was a shiny new red Firebird, with white seats (at the time they were only made in vinyl).
I now only had one mission in life, and it was to buy that car, and then get her quite attractive butt in my front seat. (It turned out to be the best investment that I have ever made in my life!)
I traveled to Ernie Miller Pontiac in Tulsa and bought a new ’75 red Firebird Formula 400, with white bucket seats. It was the only one they had in stock, and I paid $3,750 for it, which was a few hundred off sticker price. Today, these cars are worth 10x that amount if properly maintained or restored.
I drove back to Bartlesville, got to McDonald’s just in time to see the 100’s of high school students emptying inside after the basketball game that had just ended, and saw Pam. She was sitting with her boyfriend, the basketball jock star mentioned earlier. I asked her if she wanted to go see my new car. She said yes, got in the seat, and before the evening was over, I was her new boyfriend, and the old one nearly wiped out a whole row of mobile homes screeching out of the parking lot when he’d seen the coup d’état that I’d just pulled off J. Sorry _______ (name withheld to protect the innocent), I just had to . . .
Looking back on my teenage pictures (the ones hidden from me because I have burned most of the others), I am glad that Pam was blind. There is no debate needed if you accuse me of having an “extended period of geeky dorkiness.” She had to have been suffering from temporary blindness, which I am thankful for. I mean, I even let my Mom help me pick out my clothes until I was a sophomore; how dorky is that?
But, Pam saw me as a challenge worth taking, and quickly brought me up to speed with a modern haircut, modern glasses, and some Levi 501’s that made it all the way to my shoes, and a shiny polyester print shirt. (I didn’t unbutton it to the navel though like other seniors with chest hair were doing.)
We soon fell truly in love and were married in July, following her high school graduation in May. Crazy? Definitely. Stupid? Probably. But, I knew she was the perfect one for me, so why not?
And now, after 12,550 days, wow, I love her more with every one. Pam is my stabilizer, my voice of reason, and my balance. I am the risk taker. She is the risk avoider. I love roller coasters, she doesn’t. I love fast cars, she doesn’t want me to drive fast. I love the country, she loves the city. I love loud music, she wants it quiet. I love to go to guy movies, (she thinks they are vulgar), but vulgar to me is sitting through a weepy chick-flick like "The Notebook". I love OU football, she doesn’t like any football. I get up early, she gets up late. I go to bed early, she goes to bed late. She is Miss Mercy; I am, well, just get the heck out of my way. Can you imagine going through your whole life though wanting/needing to make sure you never did/said anything to hurt anyone’s feelings, ever? Wow, that would be torture for me, but for Pam, it is her spiritual gift. I don’t know how she does it.
But, with all those things, and many more that we differ on, we share many-many mutual likes and loves. Our faith, family, friends, freedoms, and food. Our time together, our travels, and our mutual disdain for paying too much in taxes. All together, we are the definition of perfect simpatico! We also now share the love of exercise, eating right, and watching our carbs. It hasn’t always been this way for me. I was not born with an exercise gene like Pam was. I still remember driving her to the local ladies gym when she was 17, and this part of her life has not changed several decades later.
She was ‘Jane’, long before Jane Fonda made a few billion dollars off of it. I only caught the bug 2.75 years ago; but I do now completely enjoy weightlifting, eating organic whenever possible, drinking only the purest water; and we rarely intentionally eat anything that is heavily carb-ridden. We do have our food splurges, but try to limit those to no more than 1x a week.Pam is my best friend. I would rather talk to her on the phone than anyone else. I would rather share a meal, a movie, or watch her enjoy a Latte than anyone else. I would rather walk the streets of Rome again with her than do so with the Pope (and I don't mean anything bad about the Pope). I just can’t imagine life without her, nor do I want to.
We have raised two awesome daughters, we have two great sons in laws. We have grandchildren that love us with all of their hearts. All of our family is healthy, lives within 20 minutes of each other, goes to the same church as we do, and they all love coming to Nini and Pappy's for any reason; be it Wii, a cookout, watercoloring, riding bikes, etc.
We are blessed, truly blessed in every sense of the word. And it all started with those blue polyester pants. I love you Pamela Jean.
Here is Barry White performing "our song" live. If you focus your eyes, and look really-really close, see if you recognize the two people seated in the 7th row, seats 1 & 2. Incidentally, the song was #1 in America in 1974, the year I first 'saw' Pam!http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fcd3XuQwDQQ
These are the original lyrics (if you want to try and sing along):
Prelude:
We got it together didn't we?
We definitely got our thing together don't we baby?
Isn't that nice? I mean really, when you really sit and think about it, isn't it really-really nice?
I could easily feel myself slipping more and more away to that simple world of my own,Nobody but you and me. We got it together baby.
Song:
My first, my last, my everything
And the answer, to all my dreams
You're my sun, my moon, my guiding star
My kind of wonderful, that's what you are
I know there's only, only one like you
There's no way God could have made two
You're, you're all I’m living for
Your love I'll keep for ever more
You're the first, you're the last, my everything
In you, I've found so many things
A love so new only you could bringCan't see you if you, you'll make me feel this way
You're like a first morning dew, on a brand new day
I see, so many ways that I, can love you
'Till the day i die...
You're my reality, yet I’m lost in a dream
You're the first, my last, my everythingI know there's only, only one like you
There's no way God could have made two
Girl you're my reality, But I'm lost in a dream
You're the first, you're the last, my everything!
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