Stolen without permission. Hilarious stuff. 16 Fun Facts of Life:
1) Never take a laxative and a sleeping pill at the same time.
2) Meetings & Manager's: the reason why the human race has never achieved its full potential, and never will achieve its full potential.
3) There is a very fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness'.
4) Do you want the other person to tell you about his 'contrary to your' religious beliefs? If no, then why do you think he wants to hear about yours?
5) Do not confuse your career with your life.
6) No one cares if you do not dance very well. Just get up and dance dang it.
7) Never lick a steak knife.
8) Gossip: the most destructive force in the universe.
9) Daylight saving time: no one will ever be able to give you a clear and compelling argument for why we still need this archaic 250 year old practice once observed by the farmers of old. Who in their right mind wants it to still be light at 9:30 at night in the summer?
10) Never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant, unless you see an actual baby emerging from the groin at that precise moment.
11) Age 11: the age when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal out of your birthday.
12) The one thing that unites all of humanity is that deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are really good drivers.
13) That person that you think is really nice, if you see them being rude to a waiter; they are not a nice person after all. Waiters and waitresses have one of the hardest jobs in the world.
14) Your true friends will always love you; not so with your family.
15) Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that it was an amateur that built the Ark, but a large group of professionals that designed and built the Titanic.
16) Men are like a fine wine. They are start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the snot out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.
Now, go out there and make it a great day!
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